I fear that some mistook my "no pain, no gain" as a criticism. Please, no - it was meant to try and analyze the cause of the pain and offer a "scientific" analysis toward better and other remedies than drugs. Subjective experiences of an event are very valid. So are objective analyses. Both are needed to figure out the whole thing, and birth and breastfeeding are no exception. If we get too "clinical" or objective, the "you don't get it" statements begin. If the teller sticks to the feelings only, there are no universal principles to be learned from the telling. As LCs, we need to know both the emotional and physical (clinical) side of birth and breastfeeding. As a profession, we arose from dual roots - the subjective knowledge gained from women talking to women, and the objective knowledge gained from scientific analysis. It's not an either-or situation. LC work is both. To all who had birth experiences, or breastfeeding experiences, that were not what you expected - TALK ABOUT IT to loving people who will listen. This is how psychic integration takes place. Sometimes it just takes a while! If birth weren't important, we wouldn't want to talk about it so much. Linda Smith, still remembering my first birth experience vividly 25 years later.