Hi All, For me, the bottom line is that if a parent feels comfortable with their choice of how to feed or care for a baby (smoking or immunizations, etc.) then that is fine for them. It is our job to give the information - not our job to make the decision - I think we all agree on that one. I also believe that we MUST take our own personal opinions out of the information. Re: health issues such as ABM, smoking, immunization, parenting style, BF, etc. - As an LC I give moms the facts that I know, give them my own personal opinion (when appropriate letting them know that this is what I chose to do and what they choose is thier own decision) and tell them to RESEARCH the information on the subject and make their own educated choices and take responsibility for that. Those who blindly do what the Dr or anyone tells them to are making uninformed and uneducated decisions. Parents often do what they are told while feeling uneasy about it because they have not been taught to trust their instincts. I don't believe that we must actively "discourage" a mom from using ABM in conjunction with breastfeeding - I believe that we have an obligation to give her the facts and let her choose for herself. Make her aware of the risks associated with the option and let her take responsibilty for that. We should, I believe, also make her aware that we will support her in any decision she makes and help her continue with BF as long as possible so that she understands that we are still 'on her side', so to speak. I have just run in to too many situations where, for whatever reason, mom chose to do both BF and ABM - that was her choice and sometimes her only option - she felt guilty for it for her own reasons, but my job as an LC was to help her be comfortable in her decision and to feel good about the fact that she was still BF and to help her continue with that for as long as possible. I don't believe that this is in any way a means to reduce her guilt load - but in fact a way to help her take responsibilty for a choice that she needed to make for her own reasons and to learn to be comfortable that she is doing what is best for her and her baby. While I have found myself many times not agreeing with a parents choice - I have to remember it isn't MY choice. Unless the parents' choice is something that can seriously harm or kill their child (like only feed 4 times a day), then it isn't our job to convince them to do it the way we would. There are many familes that choose to circ, BF and abm feed and immunize - there are many families who choose to not circ, not immunize and only BF - there are many families who choose other combinations of parenting - not every family is the same and what works for one, won't always work for the other. We have to be able to meet the parents where they are - not where we are - and not neccessarily where society in general is... Parents need to feel comfortable not only with their decisions but also that their LC (or HCP) is someone who will give them the tools to make these educated choices and then accept them where they are without judgement - whether we agree with their decision or not. After all, it isn't our baby... These are just my thoughts...I am all for educated and very well informed consent to all parenting choices - including but not limited to BF, ABM feeding, immunization, AP, circumcision, smoking, etc...sometimes the health issue that comes up is very different from what we might expect regarding these very issues. Warmly, Jaye ever the liberal... *********************************************** To temporarily stop your subscription: set lactnet nomail To start it again: set lactnet mail (or digest) To unsubscribe: unsubscribe lactnet All commands go to [log in to unmask] The LACTNET mailing list is powered by L-Soft's renowned LISTSERV(R) list management software together with L-Soft's LSMTP(TM) mailer for lightning fast mail delivery. For more information, go to: http://www.lsoft.com/LISTSERV-powered.html