Karleen writes: 'I can see this being more and more of an issue that people have with breastfeeding with them thinking that we can't allow children to breastfeed for comfort because it will lead to "comfort eating" ' 
This could seem plausible on the surface, but what about the school of thought that holds that if your needs were not met at the developmentally appropriate time and in the developmentally appropriate way, you will continue to try to meet that need no matter how maladaptive or unhealthy or inappropriate it is?  Like, DOH, could this be why a lot of us eat for comfort far beyond what our bodies benefit from?  Maybe we didn't get the comfort we should have had when we were small children.  I know this is a far-fetched notion (since neuroses are practically unheard of amongst us, I mean) but still, think about it.  I think this is one of those mysteries like the chicken and the egg - which came first, the need for food or the need for comfort?  If comfort and companionship were not meant to go together, our breasts would be on our backs, or between our umbilicus and our pubic bone, so there wouldn't be the same kind of social interaction during feeding of our young.  Possibly the interaction is so important that it has determined the placement of our food producing glands.

I heard that in France the most shockingly sad thing one can say about someone is that they always eat alone, and one of the goals of geriatric care in the community is to ensure that people have company while eating.  Don't know if it's true, but it is true that the obesity epidemic has not reached the same proportions in France as in much of the rest of Europe, not to mention the US, and nobody can accuse the French of eating a low-fat, low-carb diet.  

Here in Norway there is a term to describe practice in restaurants to prevent people from occupying space without buying a meal.  It is also used to prevent people from drinking alcohol without food.  The word is 'spiseplikt', literally 'duty to eat' and guests will be firmly informed if a restaurant practices it.  I really liked the saying that fathers exist so that babies will learn that love is not the synonymous with food, and I have paraphrased it and adapted it to a Norwegian cultural sensibility by saying father's arms are the place where you can get love without spiseplikt.  Yes, we all know that eating together builds relationships but there are other ways to build relatonships as well, just look at all the e-mail friends we have nowadays and we've never sat down to break bread with most of them.   That said, when I want to do something nice for a friend, I cook them a meal and I think loving thoughts about them while I'm doing it because I think it matters.  I bake bread and I think about what nourishment it will bring to those who eat it and I knead it with love.  One of my wisest colleagues said 'Never bake your anger, wash it away instead', meaning you can go after dirt with a vengeance but food should be prepared with a loving mind.  Personally I have a hard time feeling angry when I am cooking because I enjoy it so much.

Rachel Myr
this message is being sent from Margalo's WiFi - I am ON A BOAT in a place with no mobile phone coverage, but internet works fine :-)

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