Melinda,  you said of your client:  "She thought if she stopped nursing or cut
back
on her breastfeeding that her husband would take a more active role in
the babies needs."

She was distressed and it sounds like you were, too.  I think this happens more
in the west that we hear about, as it forms the subtext for many feeding
decisions.  It has been very clearly described as a concern for women in some
developing countries by Penny van Esterik in 'Motherpower and Infant Feeding'.

I find it a challenge to remember than women are still in a position in society
and in their own heads that they place the wishes, perceived or actual, of men,
above other considerations.  However, that is both the economic and emotional
reality of women's lives.

I became a teenager in the '60's, so imbibed some stated ideals from that era.
My blackest times of greatest self-disgust come when I realise how deformed my
own life has been and still is because of the inequality between the sexes which
flourishes in so many ways in our world.  And I know men are damaged by this
too.  Babies socialised into societies where this is happening catch the
fall-out.

Magda Sachs
Breastfeeding Supporter, BfN, UK

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