I find it fascinating that you on Lactnet are discussing whether to tell a
mom or not about the "red flags"...

Just by your own self-selection YOU are the BEST people to discuss red flags
with moms - you are knowledgeable yet willing to reach out and learn from
others, you are willing to learn not only from the "experts" and the
research and books, but are aware that others with less experience also have
a great deal of information and suggestions to offer...

While reading messages, we tend to use our own inflections and "voices" so
at times the words written by one "Lactnetter" would not sound right coming
out of YOUR mouth - but I have a great deal of confidence that in YOUR
voices, the information and support would be understood and felt by the mom
you seeing - even when discussing "red flags".

I've been teaching the "three step counseling" to two Peer Counselor classes
(one on Fridays, one on Saturdays) the first group is a mixed group of many
ethnicities - the second group mostly African American.  It's interesting
how they all "get" it when I demonstrate how two simple words "how come" can
come out as challenging and derogatory or demonstrate interest and concern.


HOW you bring up, discuss and plan for dealing with the "red flags" makes
all the difference - and if you do it "wrong" with one mom - hopefully
you've learned and know (most of the time) how to change your approach to
provide the support the moms need.  (Says she who two days ago on the phone
did not do as good a job as she could have and wished she had...)

..so it seems the answer isn't "should" you...but "how" and "when"...

Jeanette Panchula, BSW, RN, PHN, IBCLC
California, USA

See more updates on our website: http://cdph.ca.gov/breastfeeding

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