Norma writes:
I wrote yesterday about the article I wrote for the Elmira Star Gazette
which was published as an Opinion piece. For those who have not yet seen it, I am
copying it below. Some of the
comments written by readers might inspire you to add your own thoughts.
Personally, I am still reeling! Do people not actually READ an article before
commenting on it?
~~ Norma,
My heart goes out to you. First, no this person did not read the article, or
at least she is not commenting on your article as it is written. She seems to
be commenting on the "breast is best" language she has probably seen and
heard for years. She is defending herself and the choices made for her when she
was an infant, and maybe ones she made for her own children as well. Except
that the Global Strategy for Infant and Young Child feeding lists expressed
milk from the baby's own mother second, and wet-nursing or banked milk from
another healthy mother as third, I would not have said one word different in
your article. The point remains. The facts are on your side, but this woman is
not writing about facts. She is writing to defend her life, in a sense. I
wonder if she would say the same thing about other areas of knowledge that have
changed drastically since she was a baby: would she not use a car seat for her
own children because she was never killed or injured in a car accident as a
child, does she not wear a seat belt herself because she they didn't exist
or were not common practice when she was little, would she only give her child
or herself vaccines that existed when she was young, if she does vaccinate?
If all these things were true it would be sad, but she would be consistent in
her approach to life. I find that people are often inconsistent when it
comes to the issue of babies and children breastfeeding, in a way that is unique.
It is also I think an artifact of the "breast is best" focus, where
breastfeeding was not normal but special somehow. I would never deny that
breastfeeding and amazing and special, but the point is that it is normal. The point is
that it brings a baby toward their highest competence, highest IQ for that
person, not higher than average or higher than the neighbor's child's. It
brings a child toward their optimum gut function, immune system function,
neurophysiologic function, emotional function etc., not that any child who
breastfeeds will never get sick, or never have emotional problems, or be more popular
or healthier than the next child. These affects are seen over populations, but
because people become defensive when they feel this is an individual thing,
we hear statements like this. The woman's point is that she feels she did not
miss anything by not being able to breastfeed. Although she is wrong, we
don't know the extent to which she was wronged by that circumstance. Maybe it
only made a difference of a few IQ points, maybe she had 2 colds a year instead
of 0 or 1. Her life feels right to her, and there's nothing we can say about
that except that this isn't really the point. It was not the point of your
article, which was well-written and very necessary and timely. (That paper was
smart and lucky to have you as their contributor while they did. I wonder if
they cut any other PUBLIC HEALTH columns, for that is what yours is/was.)
The woman who commented made herself her point in reaction to a focus on
breastfeeding as a "best" , rather than a normal. I wonder if the use of "best
practice" in professional language might actually bleed over and help us out
here, since for many hospitals, businesses, etc "Best Practice" is the new
expected norm... just musing this morning of New Year's Eve. Maybe then everyone
will get to understand that breastfeeding is not to make one's baby smarter
than their cousin, or healthier than the neighbor, but to give each and every
child their due, what the body and mind "expect" and need for optimum
function.
Peace to all,
Judy
Judy LeVan Fram, PT, IBCLC, LLLL
Brooklyn, NY, USA
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