i have nothing very helpful to add, but one hopeful thought:  i can't
remember the specifics precisely, but didn't darillyn starr get one of her
adopted babies to latch *for the first time* (having never been breastfed
before) at 11 months of age or so?  It seems to me that that certainly
points to holding out hope that a 20 month old who "acts like a one year
old" and *did* nurse for a while, albeit a long time ago, might indeed be
possible to coax back to the breast.  mostly i wanted to say "rah rah!"
though, and wow!  what a lot you have been through - please do keep us
updated and i look forward to an informative discussion here on lactnet,
but  mostly i hope that the outcome, whatever it may be, will bring you a
sense of completion and satisfaction.  warmly,

Lyla Wolfenstein

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