Date:    Fri, 9 Feb 2007 18:11:04 -0600

From:    Kathy Eng <[log in to unmask]>

Subject: mother's goals and respect

 

I think many breastfeeding supporters want to encourage mothers to
breastfeed and tend to not ask mother what her goals are, or what she wants
to do feeding wise. I see this all the time at my job. Nobody asks mom what
she wants to do after assessing the breastfeeding, they just push forward
and try to cure the problem of her using formula, or use forceful counseling
to convince her to exclusively nurse. There is a real issue between those
that think all we should be pushing mothers and those that think we need to
ask mothers first what kind of help they want.

 

It is respect to have mom vocalize what she wants and then aim your
counseling or help at meeting her goal. It is not respect to take a mom like
this and try to "make" her nurse more, or whatever, so that she meets our
criteria. Plus if your counseling is not aimed at her goals, it won't work!

 

I guess this bugs me so much because I get the referrals to some of these
moms who are mostly formula feeding but staff feels mom needs BF help, and
guess what? The moms do not return my phone calls for help, or if they do
answer the phone they do not want an appointment with me, but say they have
been helped enough and feel good about what they are doing feeding wise.
This is not to say we should not encourage mothers or talk about the
benefits but we have to take each situation individually and tailor our help
to what the mother wants or needs.

 

Kathy Eng, BSW, IBCLC

 

     Hi,

I totally agree with Kathy. However, for so long we tried to convince moms
and prove how good breastfeeding is and often just talked about the benefits
of it.There are no "benefits" of breastfeeding. It is just a natural normal
process and what moms need to know are the risks of NOT breastfeeding for
her to make an informed decision. 

Cheers,

Naznin.   


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