Wearing my writer/free speech advocate hat this time.
 
 Yes, words do have great power and meaning. However the language of "banning" makes me a tad nervous.
 One of the problems with language (even when we speak the same language) is that inflection, context and perception have a role as well. I think we all get so wrapped up in the presentation part, that little attention is placed on how we impact the recipient of our ideas and plans.
 
 We spend so much energy debating concepts and words rather than to dialogue and find common ground with our colleagues, patients and the public at large.
 
 Here are a few things to ponder:
 
 A comparison of Dialogue and Debate
 
 Dialogue is collaborative: two or more sides work together toward a common understanding.
 Debate is oppositional: two sides oppose each other and attempt to prove each other wrong.
 
 In dialogue, finding common ground is the goal.
 In debate, winning is the goal.
 
 In dialouge, one listens to the other side(s) in order to understand, find meaning and find agreement.
 In debate, one listens to the other side in order to find flaws and to counter its arguments.
 
 Dialogue enlarges and possibly changes a participant's point of view.
 Debate affrims a participants own point of view
 
 Dialogue reveals assumptions for reevaluation.
 Debate defends assumptions as truth.
 
 Dialogue causes introspection on one's own position.
 Debate causes critique of the other position.
 
 Dialogue opens the possibility of reaching a better solution than any of the original solutions.
 Debate defends one's own positions as the best solution and excludes other solutions.
 
 Dialogue creates an open-minded sattitude: an openness to being wrong and an openness to change.
 Debate creates a closed minded attitude, a determination to be right.
 
 In dialogue, one submits one's best thinking, knowing that other peoples' reflections will help improve it rather than destroy it.
 In debate, one submits one's best thinking and defenids it against challenge to show that it is right.
 
 Dialogue calls for temporarily suspending one's beliefs.
 Debate calls for investing wholeheartedly in one's beliefs.
 
 In dialogue, one searches for basic agreements.
 In debate, one searches for glaring differences.
 
 In dialogue, one searches for strengths in the other position.
 In debate, one searches for flaws and weaknesses in the other position.
 
 Dialogue involves a real concern fo rthe other person and seeks to not alienate or offend.
 Debate involves a countering of the other position without focusing on feelings or relationship and often belittles or deprecates the person.
 
 Dialogue assumes that many people have pieces of the answer and that together they can put them into a workable solution.
 Debate assumes that there is a right answer and that someone has it.
 
 Dialouge remains open-ended.
 Debate implies a conclusion.
 
 Adapted from a paper prepared by Shelley Berman/ Dialogue Group of the Boston Chapter of Educators for Social Responsibility.
 
 Dialogue is challenging, but the in the long run creates allies, strengthens and empowers everyone-
 
 IMHO we need this kind of paradigm shift in our work.
 
 Moving to "yes" and "win-win" solutions.
 
 Pierrette Mimi Poinsett MD
 Petaluma
  
 
 
   
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