I decided to ask some women in the trenches how they felt about this- moms
on the MOBI list. There was an avalanche of posts today!  The overwhelming
response was that, for the most part, they wanted to know. Many felt haunted
by what they did or did not do in the early days when they were clueless,
wondering if their outcome might have changed if they were prepared for the
possibility of problems from day one. They also raised the issue of the
emotional devastation of finding out in the midst, and leaned towards the
idea that they would not have felt as devastated if they had been forewarned
of a possibility. One mother pointed out that support systems are
everything, and while it would be nice not to be told too much too soon,
that assumes that the woman can and will be followed closely and
intervention *will* occur at the first sign of trouble. But we all know
better. Several women reiterated the statement, "Knowledge is power."

They also wrote articulately about how information can and should be
delivered. They wanted to hear it with positive note-- "some women with your
breast shape have trouble, but others don't.  If you have any trouble, let
us know right away and we'll work together on it...."  

And they were also grateful to hear that we as professionals were discussing
this, taking time to consider what they need from us.

I have to tell you that I am learning so much listening to them. 

~Lisa Marasco

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