Melissa brought up a very valid point that needs consideration <mm..is
Dad trying to avoid paying child support by asking for 50/50>. This was
the case when I first got divorced with my ex. The lawyer should be well
versed by the mom on their pre-divorce relationship and their current
relationship. As their current relationship may be the issue
(adversarial or 'getting even' motivated) or the father sees money as
the last grasp of control he has on his ex-wife. In other words this may
not be about parenting or the child, it may be about the parent's
relationship - and the child must not be sacrificed if this is the
motivation in this case.

On this issue also, Being There by Isabella Fox, PhD is a great book on
the separation issue of child and mother, not death, but the separation
from employment, travel and such, and it's effect on the infant. She has
a good deal of information on how to cope with this issue and ease the
damage done when there is no other alternative and her references are
great. (IMHO) this should be required reading for all judges who hear
these custody cases, also good to recommend to lawyers for the mom
and/or child.

Leslie Ward
Vine Grove, KY

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