Here is my response to Erica Jong's Op Ed piece, I am going to send it off to the NewYork Times. Lisa Mooney.

	I
was immensely disappointed after reading Erica Jong’s Op Ed Piece, “ Is Sex
Passé? Not only is it full of assumptions on the part of the Author, but it
clearly leaves out a very important piece of the puzzle regarding Sex and it’s
various expressions in individuals and thus societies, namely the concept of
pleasure. She states, “Better to give up men and sleep with one’s children.
Better to wear one’s baby in a man-distancing sling and breast-feed at all
hours so your mate knows your breasts don’t belong to him. Our current orgy of
multiple maternity does indeed leave little room for sexuality. With children
in your bed, is there any space for sexual passion? The question lingers in the
air, unanswered.” 

	Merriam
Webster Dictionary defines pleasure as sensual gratification.  Gratification of the senses, is that
not what sex is? Gratification through Orgasm with the resulting rush of
Oxytocin and Endorphins that make us feel euphoric for the 30 to 60 seconds the
Orgasm lasts.  Then what?  Is sex the only way to experience
bodily pleasure, passion and expansion of the senses?  Where does the ability to perceive and receive such pleasure
begin? It begins right after birth when our mother breast feeds us, when both
mother and baby receive a huge surge of Oxytocin.   Oxytocin is getting  a bit of media coverage as
its role as the social hormone.  It
bonds us to others. We produce it in large amounts right after the birth of a
placenta, at time of Orgasm, when snuggling with our mate, when we first fall in
love or while enjoying a great meal with friends. Many women report that
breast-feeding is pleasurable. Many women are also sexually active while
breast-feeding, as evidenced by her mention of, “ …orgy of multiple maternity…”
In my mind the question that lingers in the air is, is your bed the only place
sex can be had? Let’s get a little more creative. 

	The
mother continues to produce Oxytocin surges every time she breast-feeds her
child and the child receives it via her milk. It continues to be produced while
the mother and infant enjoy close connection through bodily contact, i.e. the
child being worn in a sling.  This
primes the child’s brain to be able to experience pleasure more readily and
easily when he is older, by bathing the neurons in a stew of pleasure
peptides.    Contrary to
what Erica Jong proposes, the opposite is closer to the truth. As a Nurse
Midwife and Lactation Consultant I work with more than 3,3oo mother and baby
pairs every year, and they are not being slung, co bedded or breast-fed on
demand. A very rare few enjoy such a precious good start. Most of them are
being bottle fed at least half time, left to cry in the crib, so they will not
become spoiled and/or have a pacifier stuck in their mouth when they cry to
“shut them up”. No wonder they grow up wanting relationships with distance,
Internet sex, and endless Caramel Macchiato’s at Starbucks, that has become
their set point through their early experiences and subsequent neurological
priming.  Lisa Mooney CNM MSN IBCLC 




 		 	   		  
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