>While it is "common" it is not "normal" for a child to nurse 4x/24 hours
>  or to "self wean" at 10 months.  Typically children nurse 10-12+ times
> for the first 2 years.
>

I so appreciate this information.  I don't always know what is normal vs
what is typical,
because my kids both nursed long term and frequently by the most liberal
definition.
 We had multiple food intolerances
with the first (healed and headed off for the second, Woo!) so the taps
were always on :)

I took a call from a mom
today who thought that someone else's 2yo nursing 6-7x per day was abnormal
and must be a sign of food intolerances.

 Another mom is puzzled as to why her kids self-wean around 12-15 months.
 She
does not offer the breast for comfort, and is strongly opposed to nursing
to sleep.  She wanted answers, but insisted that she nursed totally on cue
and never refused a request.  I've seen her refuse or ignore what to me
were very plain cues.  I had to walk away from the conversation.

Another mom mentioned very cheerfully that tired, cranky, and hungry
often go together and nursing fixes all of them, with snuggles as a bonus.
I don't know how I could have parented without the nursing relationship, and
kudos to moms who aren't able to nurse but still maintain that closeness!

I don't know that I have a clear question, but I really find myself
wondering how it is that moms are so sure they nurse on demand, and yet
they do not recognize many cues.  Maybe that's why I hear from women whose
fertility returns despite "exclusive bf."  Somebody's version of ecological
bf for child
spacing includes/included a nap with baby who has breast access while they
sleep,
and that implies a certain free attitude about nursing that I don't see too
often.
I would not be surprised if those moms
who CIO have de-tuned themselves from their children in a very visceral,
fundamental way.

Lynn Carter OFS LLLL IBCLC
Missouri, USA

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