Cathy Bargar's post about disliking The Womanly Art struck a real chord with
me.  Even though I know well how many people that book really has helped, for
me also it was more of a millstone than a steppingstone.

I think that for people who need what I think of as philosophy of
breastfeeding -- or what others might call permission to breastfeed -- it is
probably a gift.   The things others have said they learned from this book are
nearly all in this category -- "you don't *have* to feed your baby every 4
hours, you *are allowed* to sleep with your baby," etc etc.   On the other
hand the mothers who can, like me and Cathy, be undermined by it are the ones
who are already motivated to bf but need *technical* know-how.   For me, too,
Bestfeeding was a lifesaving book -- lots of specific technique, pictures,
etc.     The problem with getting a book of philosophy when you need a book of
technique is that it's very composition implies that you don't need techniqe
-- that if your philosophy is good and you have the right attitude toward your
baby you already have everything you need.    True if you are lucky, untrue if
you are most American women at least.  I'm not saying that the authors of
TWAoBF believe this -- but that their book by emphasizing philosophy over
technique in its pages gives this message indirectly.

So at the risk of saying the same thing I always say, I gotta repeat:  Look at
the mother.  What does this particular mother need more, lack more?
Permission, or know-how?   Different books for different moms.

Elisheva Urbas
(who has, speaking of Lactnet addiction, indeed left her sleeping husband in
bed to check her email, and who is seriously considering a brief period of
going nomail as "detox")