This has been such an up and down year for my work, that I feel one day up and
another down - I could have written both posts!  I do keep the "balance" by
realizing:
1 - I can't be perfect (LLL had an article asking why we were required to bat
1000, when even the top batters are proud when they're batting in the 300's).
2- Moms have been helped by my interventions, and few have been hurt with my
interventions, and if I weren't here they probably would have not contacted
anyone, therefore never given the chance to get correct information.
3 - I don't live in their homes, so don't know everything they are going
through.  They do the best they can in the stage and age they are in right now.
4 - Many of the LLLI Founding Mothers didn't get it "right" with their first
baby either!

The happy story - not an "ending" just a "beginning" of this last week was the
last call on Friday - from a mom who has been to see me repeatedly.

At first, she was one of the most nervous people I have ever seen - writing in a
little book every breastfeeding, every stool, every wet diaper, every question.
Her mother would come with her and we would go over each question.  She did have
sore nipples, we had to work hard on correcting suck and positioning, and
watched weight gain (more closely than I would normally, as he was FINE, but
because mom needed this).

Suddenly and horribly the picture changed - her husband, owner of a gas station,
was shot in the back and is paralized.  She rented a pump (she had a Pump In
Style but I thought this would be best), and began the process of going all day
to the hospital and nursing at night, using bottles and rarely needing formula.
She would call me almost daily with her lists of questions and feelings of
despair.  Her mother was a mountain of strength - at times taking the baby to
the hospital to be nursed, other times bottle feeding breast milk, or holding
baby off until mom got there when the milk supply was low.

Three weeks into this she called me one day and said she wanted to just pump and
stop the feedings as she found this too stressful.  How long will my milk last
if i do this?  She asked.

We talked and talked about her stress levels, her very real problems and what
were her goals.
She said her mom was scared for her and wanted to help more - and would be able
to feed the baby bottled breastmilk at night allowing her more night's sleep -
something she dearly needed with all the daytime stress.  I aked if there was a
chance she could take one 24 hour day off and stay at home in bed with baby and
try to recover physically.  She said she'd try - she'd love to rest, but felt
the baby would reject her.

The next day, I called and found out the PT's had asked her to be at the
hospital early and stay all day to teach her how to cope with her husband's
disability  - but I spoke to Grandma.  I praised her and we talked about  how
this horrible event had stolen the dreams this mom had had for her new family.
I explained to the Grandma how I had just spoken to another mom (true) who had
been very angry that due to her situation had been unable to breastfeed or even
raise her child for the first 3 years of life and how now she was trying to get
back "in tune" with her child.  I explained how one of the goals I wanted for
this mom was that this event (and this terrible person who shot her husband)
would not steal from her ALSO the goal of having a long breastfeeding
relationship with her baby.

Well, they were able to arrange a day off for mom, and while I was gone to the
US (son's graduation and Christmas) dad was given two passes to spend time at
home.  Mom and baby are still breastfeeding, and mom sounded so much more
confident.  In fact, she is returning the rented pump as she has found the Pump
In Style is now keeping her milk supply up enough.

How much of this "success" is mine?  Not much!  This took the concerted efforts
of lots of family members some who stayed with the dad so mom could rest, some
who drove  mom and of course Grandma.   But for  whatever part I was able to add
to this outcome -  it sure feels good.

Jeanette Panchula, BA-SW, RN, IBCLC
Puerto Rico
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