I am sorry that I cannot remember who wrote in about the pediatrician
who said such hurtful things to a mother who had been struggling to
maintain a breastfeeding relationship.

Unfortunately, it is not only pediatricians who do this. Friends and
relatives can also make what seems to be rather insensitive remarks,
and we all know how vulnerable a new mother feels to  anything that
smacks of criticism. Even a look can make her feel badly.

Most people do not even realise how their remarks are perceived.  They
simply do not know what is normal.  We have all heard questions like,
"Are you nursing AGAIN? I guess you don't have enough milk!"

Responding with humour can take the sting out of the remark. Once you
make the critic smile, you are halfway to getting him to open up
enough to accept some facts, and using "I" messages is a
non-threatening technique to letting him know how you feel about the
remark.

The La Leche League FAQ, "How do I respond to and avoid criticism
about breastfeeding? "
is a great source of possible replies. It can be found at:
http://www.lalecheleague.org/FAQ/criticism.html
There is also a longer article on the same subject, "Responding to
Criticism," at:
http://www.lalecheleague.org/NB/NBJulAug99p116.html

norma

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