Question for you all wise women (and men) out there in Lactnet-land...

I've been cogitating over the whole family bed/baby sleeping w/ mom, nursing
in bed issue, and I'd like to know how y'all handle it.  I'm thinking of the
mother that says, (when you suggest co-sleeping), "I can't do that, I'm
afraid he'll get into a bad habit." (or something similar).  I'm thinking of
the mother that has decided that while co-sleeping was fine for awhile, she
now wants to NOT co-sleep and wants the baby in his own bed.  How do you
advise her to do it?  I'm thinking of the sleeping through the night issue,
which for many parents is bigger than the co-sleeping issue.  What brought it
to mind was the post about the Today show, in which the statement was made
that babies SHOULD be sleeping through the night by "x" age.

How do you advise mothers to get their babies to sleep through the night if
mom really wants that?  What do you tell them?

I wonder if pediatricians/physicians/PNPs or whoever just tell parents to let
the babies cry it out because (a) it works and (b) it gets the parents off
their backs about "how long will this go on?"

I think there is more night waking at 4 to 6 months than before because
babies are so distractible at nursing, and they make up for it by wanting to
nurse a lot at night.  The advice to let them cry it out, that they
"shouldn't" be waking, that they don't "need" to eat (and they slept through
at 3 months, so that proves it) seems to me to be rather punitive.  You can't
MAKE a baby breastfeed well who is learning about and enjoying her
environment -- it is a developmental step.  But you can make sure she gets
enough nutrition by being willing to nurse her at night.

Anyway, I hope that isn't too terribly muddled, but I know what the "other"
HCPs say about sleeping through the night and night feedings (a la Ferber and
all the rest).  I want to know what the folks who really deal w/
breastfeeding and babies counsel moms about this.

Jan Barger, RN, MA, IBCLC -- whose daughter just left for her LAST semester
in college.  YIKES!
Wheaton, IL

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